It’s a proven fact. Women who spend a lot of time together biologically become “N’Sync”. Take my sister Kiersten and I for example. Last time she was in town I noticed our uteri were still on the same schedule. After being apart two and a half years, in two different states, our wombs still beckon to each other.
Just like women get on the same menstration cycle, my co-workers and I get on the same dieting schedule. It’s as if we become so comfortable in our relationship with one another that we slowly begin to let ourselves go (just like most newlyweds). Then, without any prior communication, we show up to work and we’re all “magically” on similar low carb diets. No Joke.
Now you’re probably asking yourself “Camberley, why do you need to go on a low carb diet?” My answer….”I blame this guy.”
You see, this guy and I decided to pledge our vows to one another over two and a half years ago.
Naturally, marriage leads to passion. Which coincidentally leads to rug rats. In turn, this leads to MORE RESPONSIBILITY THAN I’M WILLING TO TAKE ON IN MY LIFE. So, we’ve chosen to add a little thing called “birth control” to our marriage. This is what has caused me to latch on to a few extra pounds. If it wasn’t for the hubs (D) I wouldn’t need to take this dreadful thing. Therefore, I blame him.
I promise you, I haven’t been sitting at home eating excessive amounts of ice cream and cookie dough. Nor has my gym membership been collecting dust in my purse. NO, my eating and exercise habits have remained exactly the same. The only thing that has change in the last 5 months is a new prescription from my lady doctor.
Sorry…sorry….I’ll get back to my original story.
Anyways, now that my marketing posse and I are on low carb diets, we’ve started to eat and drink the same things (we really know how to think for ourselves). For example, each one of us packs our lunch for work. In our sacked lunch we bring 1) protein drinks 2) celery with almond butter AND 3) Kombucha (this healthy drink). Everyday.
In addition to this, whenever someone brings a new food item into work. Everyone pounces on him/her questioning “what are the ingredients in that?”, ”how much sodium does it have?”, and my personal favorite “is there any high-fructose corn syrup?”
It’s bred some kind of monster inside of me.
When I sit down to lunch with my dieting co-workers (this doesn’t happen with people outside of work, so don’t be concerned family) I start examining what everyone has on their plate. This is what goes on in my head.
“Oh…my…I wonder if they know there is mayonnaise in that”
“I can’t believe it! He’s eating rice. What is he doing!?! Low carb my A%&”
I know…I’m twisted. I haven’t even been 100% faithful on this diet. On the weekends, I don’t adhere to the rules (eeeekkkkkk! I’m a foodie. Butter and heavy cream make everything better). And here I am judging these poor, poor, unsuspecting people.
All because I’m a competitive freak.
I guess the moral of this post is, you don’t need to be genetically related to me for us to be on the same cycle.
Go Team Uteri!